The times when you stare at the empty pages of the journal and pray that it magically fills up. Those days when your passion towards writing is tested by a mind that feels more empty than a classroom after school hours. “Why am I getting this right?” “I’m a writer. I’m not supposed to feel empty” “Shouldn’t I have topics to write about all the time?” and then you take out that journal and force a word into it and then stare it like it’s going to fill up the rest by itself.
I don’t know what you call this. Some say it’s the writer’s block. Some say it’s a phase. Some say so many things. Honestly, I don’t know what it is. One minute your brain has a million things to pen about and the next it’s as blank as a newly bought A4 sheet paper. There are days when your libido for writing is so high that you write almost about anything. The moist chocolate cake that was served during last night dinner. The creepy spider crawling up your kitchen window pane. The guy ogling that you at work place. The guy you are ogling at during your waiting time at the queue in KFC. The weather that showed some mercy by showering upon. The mundane coffee that starts your day. Almost everything and anything that is no little or no significance.
Then there are days when the world is going through cathartic changes and you see it but don’t feel a thing. There is a mass shootout on an entire community. There are pseudo feminists claiming equality. A woman raped and thrown to the gutter. Trump is the new orange. Issues that are of a larger magnitude. You see it happening. You know you have something to say. You quickly open the laptop, go to MS word and then nothing! Your friends expect that you write something but you are usually the one who has something to write about. You are almost made to feel it’s your responsibility to pen down your thoughts on issues that are happening around you.
But in reality, that’s not how it works, does it? There are days and at times weeks that go by and your subscribers do not receive a new blog notification from you. “Will they unfollow me?” “What is the good frequency to blog to be called a good blogger?” “Maybe I’ll take an old post, change few things and repost” “But no, what if that makes me a stale blogger” “maybe I should try other forms of blogging” “Should I write about the outfit I wore last night at dinner?” “Yes, that’s awesome let me do it” You frantically open your blog page and start off “Last night was great. I wore this…” and you are stuck. You go through your fellow fashion bloggers page but you don’t quite get that flow and style of writing and realise you aren’t cut out for it and go back to staring into infinity for some inspiration.
As bloggers, we are made to think and feel we need to write about something or the other all the time. Each of us have our strengths. We play on it. Work on it. Experiment on it. Some bloggers are great in writing on finance and numbers. Some write on beauty and fashion. Some write mindless things to call it a blog or maybe it is a blog. I don’t know. Some write emotionally. We are all different. WE aren’t connected by thoughts because we are bloggers. If I sit with someone who blogs on economy, he/she wouldn’t engage in a conversation with me for more than a minute but would find greater interest in talking to a non blogger with a similar interest. At times, it so happens that, connect of thoughts with a non blogger is far more intense than someone who blogs. Bloggers as a community is more on the love of writing and how blogging can help you financially and help better your writing.
I think it’s perfectly ok to go through days or weeks that have gone by without a word written on paper but infinite pages written in the mind. At times, it’s okay to not publish your thoughts as blog. All your writings need not be a blog. Some can be too precious to stay in your journal. When there is a rough day, its way nicer to flip pages in your notebook and read them instead of opening up WordPress or blogger.com. Write for yourself at times. The world need not know. Let it be your little secret that you have written for yourself to read. The precious rare thoughts that are priceless to be become a blog post in your community group. Let it stay with you. This isn’t a writer’s block. It is a bloggers block. You are still sub consciously writing all the time. Some find their way to a blog and some stay in your mind but the ones that find space in your personal journal to stay there are the most precious ones. They are who you are. They are your ugly mirrors. They are what you call yourself to be. At times, they are the ones you are afraid to call yourself to the world.
Start writing….! Its okay not to blog about it 🙂